.:: woah... i havent been here in a long time...

oh and guess wat?...

i have given up my faith in people... because humankind is hopeless...

yup... completely... so i'll never trust another person... ever again... fully anyway...

there shall only be one person who is not hopeless for he is an angel... and cannot possibly be human...

i'm so retarded aren't i?...

i've gotten way too deep in something n now its like an addition... its not something bad... well to my school life... it is... but... its not something harmful... i think...

anyway... i'm border line...

|-| this close to become a goth... n ppl are still pushing... yes... i'm a goth in some ways... but officially... no...

i don't believe in labels n such so when i say 'become a goth' i mean... well... u noe... dark... distant... cold... like i'm not already...

don't get me wrong... i have nothing against goths...

anyway... was unprepared for gym today... i'm too careless sometimes... i had to sit on the bleachers with jr. and adam... ugh... so bored...

took the test today... in school... it was so uncomfortable... and hot there... i was falling asleep so... i probably did bad on this test...

andrew was 'flirting' with me again... he hit me like five times... and george was telling him to stop harrassing me... n now... these two got issues...

so tired... can barely type... lunch was horrible... 

had to write a 'how come' poem for english... didn't turn out that bad... not that good either...

have i ever said that i hated life?...

well... now i'm gonna say it...

i hate life... so bad... ::.

.:: i feel crappy...

i haven't been here in like a week... so i'll fill u in on wat's going on...

the most important crisis is... jason's heart's been broken... his girlfriend basically dumped him... and i don't noe how to help him... i replied his email... but he hasn't email bac...

i'm worried and stressed...

i don't know... but i feel like my friend is using me...

and there's this guy in my class that follows me and touches (not as in sexual harrassment) me... n i don't like it one bit...

and this guy copy off of me and is a major copy cat... not just with me... but with everyone... shit... he annoys the hell outta me... and he should never... NEVER... imitate someone... cuz... he's bad and not even funny...

n adam will never be my bf... not now... not ever...

i made friends... new ones... hurray for me rite?... ha... give me a break... i don't make friends that easily...

HE's really annoying the hell outta me... shit... i wanna change my seat...

unfortunately... i think he likes me... very unfortunately...

and as for andrew... he still has my pen... i noe he does... and he'll never give it bac... i swear... he's sending me mixed signals... one point... he was flirting... one point... he completely ignores me...

i have guy problems... and i don't noe how to deal with them... and i can't ask jason... cuz he got his own problems rite now...

at these times i wished i had another person i could go to ::.

Currently Reading Garden of Angels By LURLENE MCDANIEL see related

.::tim's not talking to me... wah... watever... at least he's talking to fion... which was my one and only purpose... so thats a big fat YAY... my mission was completed and successful... heheh...

jason emailed me again... and of course... like all the other times... he talks about stuff that's really kinda stupid... and starts with 'miss me?'... even thoe... i heard from him a couple of days ago... and of course... i always answer... 'in your dreams'... heheh... it's like a tradition...

i went to chinatown... it was boring... the cd i was listening to played over like 8 times... got really really boring... took up my whole day...

i need glasses... seriously...

i wanna see trigun... see if it's good or not... my brother says its kinda like rk but... with guns... he says it good...

but my brother's an idiot... so i can't believe everything he says... unfortunetly... it come on the weekdays at 1:00 a.m... skool days... i can't watch it... i have school!... so screw that thought...

i wrote two poems yesterday... and posted them 2day... they got some positive results... thoe one said that one of my lines were a bit... off... which is true but... hey... i ain't perfect...

i fixed my other xanga... cuz tim pointed out something wrong with it... oh well...

now... its green and black... with a white rose... which is really pretty... btw... i didn't make that layout... i couldn't make a good layout 4 life...

thats that::.

.::not much to say... i already said everything... nvm that... i finally got to talk to tim yesterday... it was kinda awkward at first but... eventually... it got easier... its kinda weird cuz... its so easy to talk to him... probably cuz he's never met me before or will ever meet me... haha... if ur wondering... tim's my friend's crush... she made me talk to him... and cuz well he logs on when she's sleeping already...

so anyway... i have to ask him wat grade he's in...

he brags... a lot...

i talked to him about an hour and a half... i didn't expect him to actually stick around... cuz he usually logs on... three seconds later... he logs off...

i made him stick around!... wait... is that a good thing or a bad thing?...

he showed me his xanga... i asked him if he liked 50 cent... and he said 'no shyt'... ok... it was an obvious question... and i'm stupid so...

then he said the weirdest thing... 'I'll take you to the candy shop.'...

yea... probably cuz i mentioned 50 cent... and then he said 'something u didn't want to hear rite?' and then... i replied 'definitely something i didn't want to hear...'... haha... yea i noe he was kidding... hopefully...

i got 100 on my spanish test!... ok... its kinda stupid but its like my first hundred in spanish in a long time... a VERY LONG time... heheh... yeah... i'm a freakishly smart and get a lot of hundreds... just not in spanish...

i don't know why but i feel like my grades are slipping...

andrew still has my pen!!!...

james freak me out...

george is... well george...

and i'm very random...

i wonder wat tim looks like... yea... i don't know wat he looks like... or even met him before... but i still talk to him... and he gave me his cell #... don't ask me why... cuz i'm clueless... then he asked me for my #... i think this was a very bad idea...

he's funny thoe... and kinda an idiot... but what guy isn't?... heheh::.